What I’ve Learned: Spring 2018

The seasons shift imperceptibly. Nature begins a dance around us, unfurling beauty and bounty. The days stretch out, strolling into sunset. There is music in the air, wisdom in the soil, a magic lingering on each wisp of wind.

Spring would have to be my favourite season. Hats and scarves are tossed aside, I hover under the crab apple tree, seeking the first hint that she is about to clothe herself in splendour. Spring brings promise. Of second chances, of beauty and life. I breathe in the mossy scent of freshly cut grass and begin to feel the building anticipation of the culmination of another year.

In Kierkegaard’s famous words, ‘life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards’. Each season I team up with Emily Freeman (and many other bloggers), pausing to reflect on what came to the surface, what I learned about myself and the world around me, and how I am different as a result.

1. Keeping a Journal is Important (and Embarrassing)

When I turned thirteen I started writing about my life, processing thoughts  and reflections (or, let’s be honest – I used it to keep a record of my many crushes!). This practice continued until throughout the ups and downs of high school, right up until I married Dave when I was the tender age of 20 (yes, I can’t quite believe it either). I try to revisit the contents of the journals once every few years and (aside from the inevitable cringeworthy factor of reading my often (unintentionally) hilarious thoughts) it always leads to some greater insights about who I am, who I was and who I want to be. It is a crazy trip down memory lane but I’m glad that I still have the incriminating evidence of my former self… even if only to have more compassion on my children when they morph into the strange beings that are teenagers.

The process has also encouraged me to get back into it, fourteen years later. Something about the way that your brain works as you scrawl across the page is very therapeutic.

2. Little Steps Lead to Big Results

The thought of writing 50,000 words in thirty days terrified me. NaNoWriMo isn’t for me, I told myself, thinking it would just be too stressful with my way of needing to meet obligations. I thought it would drive myself and my family mad. Somehow though, the routine of it, the sitting down at the same time each day, just seemed to make sense and I’m near the end of November now, with an almost complete first draft of my second book – Firemaster. I know it doesn’t work for everyone, but for me, living in the world of Vestige Academy, getting to find out what happens next every day – it was perfect. I’m actually going to miss the rhythm of it when the month is over.

3. Harvey isn’t a Baby Anymore

Somehow, my crawling, babbling little boy started walking recently and he seems so much older. Harvey is pretty much one of the pack now, toddling after his siblings with a huge grin and setting his face in concentration as he tries to figure out how to take apart anything (and then put it back together). I feel this era slipping through my fingers now – the smooth cheeks, the tiny fingers, the toothy grins. I celebrate each milestone, but there is also a bittersweet element to watching it slowly disappear.

4. Dave is an Incredible Speaker

A few weeks ago, I had the opportunity to watch Dave speak before a crowd of 800 people, and he did the most amazing job. He has this knack for bringing together philosophy, insight, story and vulnerability (always with a killer PowerPoint), which makes his communication easy to listen to and challenging at the same time.

We have been on a long journey together – from our young married days living on site at a church where he was the Young Adults Pastor, to living on campus at a Bible College, launching Tribe: Church for the Irreligious together, then leaving it all behind at the end of last year. We have been going along to City Life Casey for almost a year now, and it has been an interesting experience – of resting, learning from the example of so many selfless and generous humans there, and gearing up for whatever comes next in our faith journey. It feels like things are really coming together for us, as we both actively pursue the activities and causes that are dear to our hearts – writing for me, and micro-schools/human transformation for him.

5. Life is Better with Less Alcohol

I realised a little while ago that I was a ‘Crazy Hour Alcoholic’. Something about that time of the night makes all my defenses go down and convince myself I really do need to have a drink, which then inevitably turns into two or three. I’ve known for a long time that it isn’t healthy and I have been taking little steps in the right direction for a while now, and I’m much happier for it. Before, when I didn’t take any days off, I had no baseline to compare what it was like if I didn’t drink. Now, I know how much more energy I have, how much better I feel emotionally and mentally and how much healthier I feel when I don’t have anything. This is going to be a long journey, I suspect, but I’m glad that I’m taking little steps towards the place I want to go, and the person I want to be. If you are on this journey too, let me know. I’m using the principles of Moderation Management to get back on track.

What did you learn this season? I would love to hear about it down below! I’m linking up with Emily Freeman to share What I’ve Learned

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