The Unwavering March of Time

It was a perfect day for a wedding.

With restriction changes and date shifts, venue limits and hot spot fears, there has never been a more difficult time to get married. Our nephew, Ben, and his fiancee, Carrie, had been counting down until they could finally gather everyone together to celebrate the epic occasion. Yet, so much was left outside of their control. Who would be allowed to come? What would the weather be like for the outdoor ceremony? How would guests interact after such an explosive and divisive year?

Despite all of these concerns floating in the background, the bride and groom-to-be gave off an air of complete nonchalance. Worried? Us? They would shrug amidst all the questions and declare everything was under control.

It turns out they were completely right.

Emotions were ecstatic as we gathered our things and donned our finest gear for the occasion. The kids had been looking forward to this day for ages and (most of them) wanted to be involved in every sartorial decision. This jacket with this vest? This shirt and these shoes? In the end, it was Ivy who was the easiest to organise, scoring a (pristine) sumptuous white lace gown with matching knitted bolero for a mere $8.00 at the local Camperdown op shop during our recent holiday. She knew instantly where she was going to wear it. I was equally as lucky, with a dear friend passing on a jaunty jumpsuit that didn’t quite fit, in a bout of online shopping during lockdown. It was just the thing for a farm wedding – stylish yet comfortable.

The trip to Yarram was filled with sightings of cows and the looming of the other-worldly Loy-Yang power station which you cannot but marvel at (and feel miniscule in comparison to) when it appears, suddenly, the middle of nowhere. We hurriedly took a detour to get petrol and assist the kids into their formal wear (not wanting to tempt fate with food smears from takeaway lunch).

We made it just in time.

Handcrafted wooden signs pointed us towards the family farm and we pulled into the paddock to park, avoiding the patches of brambles and bovine droppings along the way. The backdrop was majestic – a sheer stretch of trees towering into the sky. We exchanged greetings with family, some not seen since ‘before’, and expressed our excitement and congratulations to the magnanimous groom.

The bride made her appearance to a quiet hum of anticipation, and it was difficult to know whether to zoom in on her serene face, or the overwhelm of deep emotion moving our nephew. The moment was charged with layers of love. With soulful harmonies ringing out across the expanse, the strum of the guitar and the lilting flute, the music perfectly accompanied the mood. Ben and Carrie put a great deal of thought into every aspect of the day, from the readings and message, to the arrangements for taking photos. They executed a monumentous day flawlessly, while still managing to enjoy the experience – an epic feat not to be glossed over!

The white marquee felt as if it had been transplanted from a fantasy world, with a solid pine floor for vigorous dancing and twinkling fairy lights draped across the ceiling. At night, when we turned back for one final glimpse, it felt like a portal sealing shut. The tables were arranged in long rows, provoking a festive familial atmosphere where everyone was connected. Decorations were an understated mix of rustic and classic – with hand-crafted wooden coasters as a stylish (and practical) bonboniere.

The kids marvelled at the endless supply of drinks and made their way through more than a few cans in their attempt to try everything. It was, undoubtedly, their version of heaven. Dinnertime was hearty and delicious, with a buffet of roast meats and salads, with plenty of condiments and gravy. The clink of glasses and cutlery underscored the lilting sounds of laughter and conversation.

With stunning weather, the surrounding fields served as a setting for games and frivolity. Smartly dressed kids became instant best friends, disappearing into the twilight to play tag. We gathered again for the humorous and heartfelt speeches, the full spectrum of emotion on display, from throats filled with tears of gratitude and amusing stories to recount.

After a scrumptious dessert of apple strudel, lemon cheesecake, a slice of wedding (mud) cake with plenty of fruit, the dance floor was declared open. Ben and Carrie wowed us with their expertly executed dance moves, and then the guests streamed from every angle to partake.

Watching the frivolity on display, the kids instantly wanted in, but weren’t quite brave enough to launch themselves. Dragging me up with them, they soon lost all sense of self-containment and began to bring out moves I didn’t even know they had! Harvey in particular was hilarious – starting off at the edges but gradually manoeuvring himself so that he was inside of the dancing circle, with everyone copying HIS moves! There was break-dancing, the ‘worm’ and many other elaborate routines. I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face watching them come alive.

The night was over far too soon, though we knew that we would have a cohort of very exhausted kids if we didn’t make a move to get home eventually. With one last wistful glance at the blazing marquee, we tentatively made our way back to the car in the darkness, using our phones to light the way.

Surprisingly, the kids took a while to fall asleep in the car. We made the reckless error of calling in at a McDonalds drive-thru near midnight and only ordering food for those who were awake. In the meantime, between the ordering station and the pick-up window, the remainder happened to rouse, wondering with great consternation why they had missed out. A few divided cheeseburgers and negotiations later and everyone was (mostly) happy.

Weddings are truly magical celebrations, bringing together the best of who we are as humans. History is created as we gather, and we are reminded that the unwavering march of Time continues. What a blessing it is to be part of family, to expand the reach of its arms and to enfold in a timeless embrace the comings and goings of its members. We will fondly remember the day that we stood witness to the moment when the legacy of Ben and Carrie was created – a moment that will itself give rise to generations and stories to come.

Seventeen years ago, three-year-old Ben solemnly joined us as part of our wedding party. Now, we shake our heads (and feel more than a little old) as we heartily commemorate his. In some ways, we blinked and found ourselves here, now holding a torch and glancing back to blaze the path for those who are cultivating their own.

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